My eye wouldn’t stop twitching. I was early in my career and my stress was at an all-time high. Back then, I believed that if I worked more hours, I’d get more done and that would make me less stressed.
At the time, I had spent a couple of years building my company while also finishing two degrees. The stress of constantly working was catching up to me. Instead of prioritizing rest, just thinking about stopping and accumulating more tasks on my to-do list made my eye twitch even more.
The only thing that saved me from going into complete burnout was my commitment to daily exercise. It was the only consistent commitment in my personal life; I focused the rest of my waking hours on my work and studies.
I also pushed myself and my body in other ways. I had all four wisdom teeth taken out, and I was back in meetings that afternoon. I answered messages at all times of the day and never unplugged from my email, always worried I’d miss something. Even my runs weren’t exempt from work; I picked up calls and used Siri to answer messages.
My turning point
Even though I felt completely run down, I wasn’t getting enough sleep and I began to notice that my body was slow to recover from training.
I was getting sick more often and feeling a lot of brain fog. But I continued to push through. After years of working this way, my body was forcing me to slow down.
My running coach told me something that finally forced me to pause and shift my perspective on work: “If you don’t rest, your body will do it for you”.
I’m ashamed to say that what finally pushed me to change was realizing how much my productivity had dropped because I was burning out. It was the decline in my output that made me start looking into self-care—ironic, I know.
So I did what I do best–I studied the problem. I didn’t just look at productivity. I also researched rest, cognition and work-life balance. I implemented many of these lessons, and managed to stop my body and mind from going into full burnout. I want to share some of the things I have done to achieve my version of work-life balance.
Before I get into it, here are a couple of things to keep in mind:
- I say my version of work-life balance, because my routine is something that works for me. Others might say I’m still working too much.
- One thing I’ve learned on this journey is that it’s rare to achieve balance and maintain it all the time. Instead, we have to adjust based on our current circumstances and how busy we are.
So I invite you to reflect on what work-life balance means to you. Don’t look for one cookie-cutter way of achieving balance.
Restart your morning routine
I know extreme morning routines are all the rage, but I promise I won’t tell you to wake up at 5 a.m. so that you can accomplish 10 things before you start work.
On the other extreme, waking up late or right before you have to leave doesn’t prime you for a good and focused day.
Here are some of the things I need to do to feel centered before work:
- Eat a nutritious breakfast: My meetings often roll over lunch and I can’t stop to eat. Breakfast is a must to keep my energy up.
- Write a gratitude list: I write a quick bullet-point list in the mornings, but there are different templates you can try out. Gratitude lists might feel very simple, but research shows a strong connection between gratitude and stress reduction.
- Do a morning brain dump: A quick morning brain dump works like a journal and allows me to put on paper all the things I’m concerned about or that are floating in my head. This allows me to take some of those things and add it to my to-do list.
- Organize my day: By reviewing my tasks, meetings and priorities for the day, I can identify what’s most urgent and avoid getting sidetracked by less important tasks. This helps me adjust my to-do list based on the time I have available.
All of this can take about 30 minutes, but it makes a huge difference because it prevents me from feeling like I’m playing catch-up all day, especially on very busy days when it’s easy to let this routine slip.
Create systems that work for you
Beyond morning routines, organizing your tasks effectively can greatly reduce stress. A research article points out that people report on average having 15 goals and projects at any given time. That’s a lot to keep track of, and our brains can only retain so much information. Constantly worrying about things we should do and trying to remember them can hinder our ability to be productive and finish tasks.
I love brain-dump to-do lists, so I created this system for myself:
I note down anything I need to do in an "inbox" to-do list (I’ll even ask Siri to add an item just before I fall asleep so I can avoid looking at my phone).
Then, as part of my morning routine, I go through this brain dump and distribute the items across my different lists–projects, personal, house, etc.–and assign a date to those tasks.
Once I add something to my list and assign a date to it, I know I’ll get a reminder, which helps it occupy less space in my brain. There are plenty of fancy apps that can help you accomplish the same thing. But after trying many of them, I realized I prefer simplicity, so my current favorite is TickTick.
Creating your own systems will help you focus on your immediate priorities. It will also help you stay on track with your long-term goals–without getting distracted by all you’ve got going on in the future.
Find small pockets of rest
As I mentioned before, I usually work through lunch. So I keep a drawer packed with my favorite protein bars to make sure I can eat something during short breaks between meetings.
Your mornings might be packed, so find times in your schedule that work for you. You can add a bit of journaling or a gratitude list in a short break you might have between meetings or even during your wind-down time at night.
- Introduce focus time on your schedule if you can. I schedule hours each week during which I won't take meetings unless absolutely necessary; this time is dedicated to deep work. It could be a report I am working on, or an article. I will close all my apps and redirect my focus entirely to that task for the time being.
- Note how much time you are spending scrolling on your phone, and try to replace that behavior with something else. I bring my Kindle with me everywhere I go, and use those pockets of time to catch up on reading.
Lastly, I have been singing the praises of exercise to anyone that would listen, so I have to add it here. I have been a long-distance runner for more than 10 years, but I also cycle, snowboard, go to the gym, play tennis, hike, paddle board and enjoy many other activities.
The trick here is finding something you like and that works with your current schedule, so you can stay consistent.
I work out frequently, but when I travel for work, I often have to reduce my training time. Adapting to big shifts allows me to stay consistent and removes the stress associated with setting unreasonable expectations or unachievable goals.
Keeping a list of activities gives you variety and helps you choose what feels right on any given day. It also helps if you can find a time of day when you're less likely to be interrupted.
A lot of people love to workout in the morning, but after experimenting with my own schedule, I found that the end of the day is ideal. It allows me to sweat out the stress from the day and decreases the chances I’ll be interrupted by work.
Writer, speaker and consultant Alex Soojung-Kim Pang has long been a proponent of rest as a prerequisite for a healthy work-life balance. He also argues for exercise as an important part of a healthy nervous system.
Strenuous exercise can retrain your body’s reaction to stressors. Exposing yourself to predictable, incremental physical stressors in the gym or playing field increases your capacity to be calm and clear-headed in stressful real-world situations.Alex Soojung-Kim Pang
“Strenuous exercise can retrain your body’s reaction to stressors. Exposing yourself to predictable, incremental physical stressors in the gym or playing field increases your capacity to be calm and clear-headed in stressful real-world situations.”
Explore what works for you
In the end, it's about discovering what works best for you. Note down days when you felt energized or overwhelmed and pay attention to what your schedule looked like on those days. Doing this over a week could be a great start to creating the right balance that best suits you and your needs.